Jokes

    • My dad joke for today ...

      A clown was pulled over for speeding.
      As the officer was writing the ticket, the cop noticed several machetes in the car.
      “What are those for?” she asked suspiciously. “I’m a juggling clown,” the man replied. “I use those in my act.” “Well, show me,” the officer demanded.
      So the clown got out the machetes and started juggling them, first three, then more, finally seven at one time, overhand, underhand, behind the back, putting on a dazzling show and amazing the officer.
      While the clown was performing this amazing circus act, a car passed by. The driver did a double take and said, “My God. I’ve got to give up drinking! Look at the test they’re giving now.”
    • TO THE ADMIN OF THIS GROUP;
      CAN YOU PLEASE TRY TO HAVE A LITTLE MORE CONTROL OVER WHO YOU LET IN. THERE IS A NEW MEMBER. AN ELDERLY WOMAN. SHE HAS BEEN PRIVATELY MESSAGING MEN. SHE SENDS NAKED PICTURES OF HERSELF IN GROTESQUE POSES ALONG WITH CLOSE UPS OF HER LADY GARDEN. SHE IS OFFERING A SAMSUNG GALAXY S8 IN EXCHANGE FOR SEXUAL FAVOURS.
      I AM ESPECIALLY UPSET BECAUSE AS IT TURNS OUT, THE PHONE WASN'T EVEN A GALAXY S8... IT WAS A GALAXY S5 AND IT OBVIOUSLY HAS A VIRUS BECAUSE IT'S REALLY SLOW. IF THAT WASN'T BAD ENOUGH... THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON STICKS!